It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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