Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
