Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Randomize
