Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
