She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
