East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
