Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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