yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
