I am puke
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
