I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
