Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
