as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
i just sent this text using only my big toe
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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