it wasn't lemon gatorade
he puts the penis in happiness.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize