she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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