that's an acceptable place to lick
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
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As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
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