just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Randomize
