Your dad touched me again.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Green mimosas i think yes
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
