Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
