i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
