i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
