yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize