She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Randomize
