it wasn't lemon gatorade
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we literally take a cab across the street
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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