He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Randomize
