Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
