I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
