haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Your shirt... Was in my pants
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
