I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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