this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I wish they made helmets for livers.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
