so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I CAN MOONWALK!
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
