Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
