remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
