Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
