They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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