There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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