he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
