i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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