i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Randomize
