and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Your shirt... Was in my pants
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
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