Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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