Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
