But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Please, let me fuck your mom
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
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Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
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Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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