What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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