Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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