I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
