and she was petting her beer can
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
