I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
