I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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