Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
