no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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