Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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